Write down what you’re feeling, if that helps. If you don’t want to open up to a friend, opening up to a journal can make you feel better, too. If you’re going to be upset for a little while because things didn’t work out with your crush, that’s okay. Let your friends know that you’re going to lie low for a little while and don’t force yourself to be super social if you’re just not feeling it. That being said, after a few weeks or so, it’s time to stop wallowing and to start having some form of social interaction. If you spent too much time being alone with your feelings, you may only feel worse. In general, people who suppress their feelings take longer to recover from a loss. [2] X Expert Source Amy ChanRelationship Coach Expert Interview. 1 May 2019.
Write down all of the reasons why you’re feeling angry and bitter. Acknowledging your pain is crucial to forgetting it. Once you’ve figured out where all of your negative feelings are coming from, you can begin to tackle them, one by one. If you come in contact with your crush, don’t let them see how angry or bitter you may be feeling. The best thing you can do is act completely indifferent, like you could care less about what your crush is up to. If you keep faking indifference, you’ll be surprised by how quickly you’ll really start to feel it.
If you think that your crush is perfect and that you really can’t think of one bad thing about them, then guess what? You don’t really know that person all that well. There is no such thing as a perfect person and everyone has flaws. The more you think about all of the bad aspects of your crush, the sooner you’ll see that you two aren’t right for each other after all.
Sure, you may have heard all of your friends telling you that you deserve better than your crush over and over again, but this won’t sink in until you realize it for yourself.
Staying positive is key here. If you focus on all of the good things in your life and in your character instead of the things you don’t have, then you’ll be able to move on much faster than you would if you only saw the worst in every situation.
If you have to be in the same place as your crush, like a class, for example, then you should be nice and polite without making an effort. There’s no need to be mean and it won’t make you feel better. You could delete any old texts from them, and even block their number from your phone. [6] X Expert Source Amy ChanRelationship Coach Expert Interview. 1 May 2019.
If you do have mutual friends, avoid asking about how your crush is doing. How will that make you feel better?
Give yourself a time limit – say you’ll only spend 15 minutes a day on Facebook. If you want to spend that time stalking your crush, then you won’t get to see what the people who actually care about you are up to. You could even unfollow them on social media. [7] X Expert Source Amy ChanRelationship Coach Expert Interview. 1 May 2019.
This does not mean that your crush “won” and that you can’t do anything fun anymore; it just means you have to avoid them for a little while until you feel better.
Think about it: are there certain times of day when you think about your crush the most? If so, can you do something differently during those times so you will be more likely to forget about them instead? For example, if you always stare out the window on the bus ride home and think sad thoughts about your crush, find a new pump up album and listen to that during your ride home so it becomes a positive experience, instead of a time when you think about your crush.
Don’t spend your Friday or Saturday nights alone or you’ll wish you were with your crush. Hang out with your girl or guy friends instead, and you’ll be having so much fun that you’ll forget all about your crush.
Maybe you’re feeling so down in the dumps about your crush because you don’t have a lot of things that you really care about. It could be time to find out what your passion really is by taking a class out of your comfort zone, signing up for a photography, ballroom dancing, acting, or singing class, or just trying something completely new that you have a feeling might make you happy.
Don’t let last-minute plans with friends get in the way of your “me time. ” You should treasure your “me time” like it’s a hot date with your favorite celebrity.
Make sure to get out of the house at least once a day, even if it’s just to take a half hour walk. Staying inside for an entire day is guaranteed to make anyone feel unhappy, whether they’re trying to get over someone or not.
Give it time. It can take weeks, or even months, to appreciate being single, but once you do, you’ll see that you never really needed your crush after all – what you needed was an idea of your crush that you thought would lead you to happiness, but it wasn’t the answer you were looking for, in the end. Being single lets you do whatever you want, whenever you want, without worrying about anyone else. [10] X Expert Source Amy ChanRelationship Coach Expert Interview. 1 May 2019.
If you’ve really moved on, then celebrate your victory and get excited about all of the love that will come your way.
